Last week, I spent almost 5 days in a row basically reliving the movie Misery over and over. Except there was no cathy bates, and in my version my best friend stops by to bring me a turkey sandwich, and my boyfriend stops by to feed me dinner and tuck me in.
There’s no psycho hanging over me with a hatchet, however the basic principal of incapacity is enough to make one want to turn psycho. And then the scene ended and I’m back entered into the land of the living (sort of)…Being unable to move can render anyone vunerable, and since my gym accident had done just that, I took my massive back spasm in stride as I learned, reluctantly to love the radius of my bed. This is what I learned while bed stricken for a week:
1) If a magazine is not within arms length, then it’s probably not worth reading anyway. Case in point- the Vogue I could pathetically not reach even though it was 3 inches away- filth, garbage. The Us Weekly conveniently next to my pillow- genius, a masterpiece, can’t put it down.
2) Wheat Thins are a very sustainable form of fulfilling hunger. They also happen to be the one thing I was able to buy before losing all function of my lower back. Wheat thins for breakfast? yes please. Lunch, oooh yes please, more!!! At this point, I could probably spearhead the ad campaign for Wheat Thins. That was, until I got treated to my boyfriend’s home cooked egg and chicken sandwich with fries… I’m not sure what this is, or where he got the idea, but it’s delicious. Since I couldn’t move to give my proper compliments to the chef, I had to settle for actual verbal ones.
3) I couldn’t and still can’t work out. This is slowly killing me inside, mentally, and from the looks of it, physically as well.The intense need to work out inadvertently caused my accident, and now, because of it, I can’t work out. Ah, the little ironies of life make me chuckle. Okay, fine they make me cry. Potato, Potatoe. Since I’m unable to work out at the gym for a while, I thought perhaps the second best thing would be to get in a workout any possible way I can. And so it was perfect timing when I found these amazing utensils from TheCheeky.com. They are multi functional, not only as silverware, but also as weight training of the most civilized kind. I might not be able to move my back, but at least my fingers will burn some calories.
4) Law and Order is an amazing show. Also, I’m not sure if you know this, but at any given time of day, no matter what, somewhere, some how, some channel, a version of law and order is on.Each mood calls for a different version. Feeling tired, the original, mysterious? Criminal Intent, or need some Elliot Stabler in your life… well you’ll have to forever rely on the re-runs of SVU.
5) Cats know when you’re not feeling well. At least, Fred does.
6) I love shopping on EBAY. Okay, technically I already knew that. But it increases 5 fold, when actually unable to move from your bed. I am the soon proud to be owner of a pair of criss-cross tight leggings, a peter pan collar, a vintage white lace crochet dress, and maybe these this too… what do you think? should I add this to the list?
7) I greatly desire these printed heels form Bottega Venetta. Greatly…
8) I can’t stop reading, re-reading, and dog earing all the visual stimulation in my issue of Astonish Magazine– their very first one, which I got first dibs on when I attended their launch party during Fashion Week. It hit news-stands Sept 27th, so now everyone can see what I’ve been eye-sessing over the past few weeks. And also, did I mention it was also close to my pillow.
9) Apparently, This will most likely not be my only face to face with my back, now that this accident has happened. Apparently, according to the HuffPost, we will meet again at some point in a dark alley, when I least expect it…. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/deepak-chopra/meaning-behind-back-pain_b_992322.html
10) Heating Pads are not fashionable or stylish…. or are they??? hmmmm